Friday, September 17, 2010

The Sexiest Game Developers Alive

We should be treating game developers more like rockstars. We should be recognizing instantly them on yonder street, dreaming about them entering through our bedroom windows to whisk us off to exciting, well-paced adventures with intuitive controls!

... but only if they're hot.

So here's my lowly attempt at deification... behold these sexy sex gods and goddesses of game development: (plus -- is this blog finally jumping the shark with tripe like this? or was this blog even good to begin with? there's only one way to find out!...)

Jon Shafer, lead designer of Civilization V at Firaxis. He's totally working the boy next door look -- smiling a boyish grin in what looks like some kind of well-lit post-apocalyptic construction site. Ohh he was probably trespassing! *swoon*

Jade Raymond, executive producer of Assassin's Creed II at Ubisoft. Apparently she's also does modeling work on the side -- which is, you know, extremely hard to believe. When she speaks French (yes, French!) it is said that all the French unions declare a second strike from their pre-existing strike just so they can rush home and read the transcripts on their Minitels.

Andy Schatz, designer of Monaco, founder of Pocketwatch Games. One time we made eye contact at IGF. I haven't washed my eyes since.

Jane McGonigal, designer at Institute for the Future. The day after you meet her, you will find yourself working in a soup kitchen for the common good -- she said it was just like tower defense!

Fumito Ueda, lead designer of Ico and Shadow of the Colossus at Team Ico. If you see him, try to climb his hair -- his boyish curls and locks often prove to be the most perilous. You will be utterly intoxicated by the smell of his hair. Upon your return, your friends will ask what it smelled like -- and you will answer, "like a rose made out of bacon." The room will collectively sigh in response.

C'mon, let's keep the list going. Who else is super sexy and working in video game development? (Pics or else they don't exist.)